A friend suggested I should keep a diary. She says she keeps one and it helps her to get her head round things when she feels life's running away.

So, I'm giving it a try....

Dear Diary,

Please would you help me get my head round a few things right now.

Yours sincerely


Saturday, 17 July 2010


That didn’t exactly go well.  In fact, anything that could go wrong did.  Katie missed her bus home from school because everyone was saying goodbye to the leavers. Then when she got home it was major panic because she couldn’t find her iPod and she hadn’t got any credit on her phone.  So by the time we sorted that out and got all her stuff into the car we had fifteen minutes to get to the station.  There was a mile long queue of traffic because a skateboarder had got knocked over at the lights, so we got to the station just as the train was pulling away.
The romantic dinner for two at which I was going to break the news to John turned out to be a rather fraught dinner for three at which Katie blurted out to John that I was pregnant. I snapped at Katie for telling him, so she sulked off to her room, leaving John and me rowing about why I hadn’t had the decency to tell him myself that he was going to be a father.  What a great start.
Anyway, Katie got the train this morning, and John’s gone off to play golf.  We did eventually calm down and have a proper discussion and he actually said that he was delighted and that he hoped I was too. I told him I was nervous. I said that I didn’t want to force him into a long term relationship that he wasn’t happy with, and he asked me why on earth I thought he wouldn’t be happy.  We’d been happy for six months. Why would that change? Then I told him what Katie had said.
This morning John brought me breakfast in bed and said that the main thing was that we should be able to tell each other anything and not worry about how the other one is going to react.  He’s right, I know.  I should have told him sooner.